sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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