I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
