He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
this will be a night to untag.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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