Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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