My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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