Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
