apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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