Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Randomize
