Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
