its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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