you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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