On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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