this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
barbara walters just said penis...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
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