Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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