im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
My feet surprised me
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