I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize