so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
