The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
