About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Randomize
