I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
So vagazzling was a success
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
