We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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