youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
