I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
