Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Randomize
