i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
