I bet he comes in French.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
