My room smells like vodka and shame
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
