i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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