Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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