this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
