last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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