Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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