You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
