What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize