so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Acid is not a monday night drug
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
