I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
