Taylor Swift is so right about you.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
pray to the hookup gods
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
