dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
