My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
i black out too much to be "responsible"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
