Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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