Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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