It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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