I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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