Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize