i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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