I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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