ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
