I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
