the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
