wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
