The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
