this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Please, let me fuck your mom
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
