I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize